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Brevard County Is Offering a ‘Staycation’ To The Rightful Owners of Over A Half-Ton of Marijuana

Sheriffs in Brevard County, Florida are looking for the rightful owners of 770 pounds of marijuana. 

On Wednesday, the law enforcement agency took to its Facebook account to find out who left the illegal over half-ton cash cow in a storage facility in Viera. 

If you happened to have lost or misplaced approximately 770 pounds of high-grade marijuana and would like to have your property returned, please contact our Narcotics Agents and we will be more than happy to reunite you with your lost property!!”

The post continued, “All of us at one point or another in our lives have lost or misplaced something important and are always hopeful that a good and kind person will find our lost item and do the right thing by returning it to its rightful owner.”

“Since at the Brevard County Sheriff’s Office we always strive to do the right thing, our Narcotics Agents are trying to identify the rightful owner of the approximately 770 lbs of marijuana that was seized from a mini-storage facility in Viera,” they graciously said. “I mean, trying to identify the rightful owner of the property is the very least we can do, especially since it has a street value of roughly two million dollars!!”

“So if the 770 lbs of marijuana belongs to you, all we need you to do is come down to our Criminal Investigative Services building on Gus Hipp Blvd in Rockledge and claim your property with absolutely no strings attached!! Once we properly identify you as the rightful owner we will gladly return your property and also make sure that both you and your property are kept in a secure area so that no one can try to rip you off!!”

The Brevard County Sheriff’s office even offered its meager accommodation for a “staycation.”

“In fact, we are so excited to return something this valuable to its rightful owner that we are also going to throw in an all-expenses-paid extensive “staycation” so that you can reflect for a while on exactly how much your lost property means to you!!”

Deputies are waiting for someone to claim the property at the department’s Criminal Investigative Services building. 

Facebook users clowned the sheriff’s department for the $2 million bundles saying that it had more important things to do. 

Spike Cohen said, “You can delete our comments all you want, snowflakes. We’re still ending the war on drugs and forcing you chuckleheads to go after real criminals instead of harassing people over plants. BTW it’s illegal for government officials to delete comments. Not that y’all are known for following the law for yourselves.”

Brandi Davis wrote, “​​I didn’t realize Marijuana was a narcotic, it’s a plant that grows naturally. Get the meth and crack off the streets.”

The Brevard County Sheriff’s Department is still waiting on the marijuana owners to pull up.

Keka Araujo

The Editorial Director of Sister 2 Sister and News Onyx with a penchant for luxe goods and an expert salsera. Always down to provide a dope take on culture, fashion, travel, beauty, entertainment, celebrities, education, crime, and social issues with an emphasis on the African diaspora. My work can be seen on Blavity, Huffington Post, My Brown Baby, The Root, Very Smart Brothas, The Glow Up and other publications. Featured panelist on NBC, The Grapevine, various podcasts, Blavity, Madame Noire, Latina Magazine and MiTu.

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Keka Araujo